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Thesis extended
Nov. 2nd, 2010 02:33 amI've heard positive things via email about getting an extension, and I'm just going to need the documents to back it up. Good things I hope, but nothing confirmed yet.
Here's a little quote from the wonderful email from my supervisor. I want to print out everything she's written to me, to way back when she recommended I commence honours, her faith in me has given me such self worth.
"Sometimes, when readers -- people who use literature to understand themselves and the world -- are forced to struggle with literature as work, they feel adrift, cut off from the pleasures and benefits of texts which are now associated with labour and frustration. My advice is to return to reading for the sheer hell of it, and return to your labour only when literature is once again your friend and confident. Sappy I know, but think about it before dismissing me as a crazy woman! If you'd like some recommendations of books to read that will stretch your skills as a reader while remaining pleasurable, let me know."
I never wanted to be the person who hated reading, but I realise I've probably not read a novel for fun in over a year. Even with TV shows, it's all about accumulation of trivia and rehashing nostalgia -- I don't know if I can enjoy a TV show in and of itself without watching someone else watch it with me. I feel disconnected, not sure what I enjoy. I never watched serial TV with a passion for completism until I got to about year 12, when Dad bought me Buffy and Firefly. I've found self-development through TV, but I still feel the need to push it against other people to see what shape it has. Literary criticism has taught me to see the strings, so all I have left is nostalgia. And nostalgia feels shameful, something I liked by myself ... I'm finding I'm forcing more and more of my closest loves onto other people just to validate them.
What kind of life do I want, what do I want to do after I wake up in the morning? What do I want to do for others, and how can I do this? Do I want to leave a legacy, if so, what kind?
I don't know where I see myself in the future, I am still messing around with my identity, I don't know what I actually enjoy any more.
I will ask my supervisor for some books to read, organise and pack up my honours notes, and leave them for awhile. Tomorrow begins the take-home-exam part of my coursework, 3 essays in 5 days. I hope that I'll come to it with vigour...it's funny, I never missed essay questions until the first meeting with my supervisor and realised I'd have to think of them for myself.
I keep thinking I want to write, that I want to be a writer. Perhaps after uni is finished I'll be a crazy person and enter NaNo late.
Apologies for the texty entry, I haven't learnt Dreamwidth's shortcuts yet.
Wishing you all love and happiness.
Here's a little quote from the wonderful email from my supervisor. I want to print out everything she's written to me, to way back when she recommended I commence honours, her faith in me has given me such self worth.
"Sometimes, when readers -- people who use literature to understand themselves and the world -- are forced to struggle with literature as work, they feel adrift, cut off from the pleasures and benefits of texts which are now associated with labour and frustration. My advice is to return to reading for the sheer hell of it, and return to your labour only when literature is once again your friend and confident. Sappy I know, but think about it before dismissing me as a crazy woman! If you'd like some recommendations of books to read that will stretch your skills as a reader while remaining pleasurable, let me know."
I never wanted to be the person who hated reading, but I realise I've probably not read a novel for fun in over a year. Even with TV shows, it's all about accumulation of trivia and rehashing nostalgia -- I don't know if I can enjoy a TV show in and of itself without watching someone else watch it with me. I feel disconnected, not sure what I enjoy. I never watched serial TV with a passion for completism until I got to about year 12, when Dad bought me Buffy and Firefly. I've found self-development through TV, but I still feel the need to push it against other people to see what shape it has. Literary criticism has taught me to see the strings, so all I have left is nostalgia. And nostalgia feels shameful, something I liked by myself ... I'm finding I'm forcing more and more of my closest loves onto other people just to validate them.
What kind of life do I want, what do I want to do after I wake up in the morning? What do I want to do for others, and how can I do this? Do I want to leave a legacy, if so, what kind?
I don't know where I see myself in the future, I am still messing around with my identity, I don't know what I actually enjoy any more.
I will ask my supervisor for some books to read, organise and pack up my honours notes, and leave them for awhile. Tomorrow begins the take-home-exam part of my coursework, 3 essays in 5 days. I hope that I'll come to it with vigour...it's funny, I never missed essay questions until the first meeting with my supervisor and realised I'd have to think of them for myself.
I keep thinking I want to write, that I want to be a writer. Perhaps after uni is finished I'll be a crazy person and enter NaNo late.
Apologies for the texty entry, I haven't learnt Dreamwidth's shortcuts yet.
Wishing you all love and happiness.
